Segundo Juan Devora

My eyelids are heavy today.

Keeping the open is like lifting weights.

Part of me wants to just leave them shut, not even fight it.

The breezing cools my warm skin.

I can hear the ocean waves crashing.

The beach, the sand and the reason why I can’t stay awake.

The stresses quickly departs me.

I’ve given in, I’m slipping away, my body goes limbs.

No more heavy eyes.

Feels good to be at peace.

Day #5 SJD

Quietly I sit staring at the world in front of me.

I stare at the people just passing by, some that catch my attention.

Watching them has intently has a teenager playing his video games.

I don’t miss a beat, my head is on a swivel, looking for a target to lock on.

The right channel to watch, as if the world were my cable TV.

A beautiful young jogger runs past the screen, my gaze follows her across.

Then I find it, the drama, the tragedy that Aristotle talked about.

She bursts down the path speed walking, the jogger barely misses her.

Behind her a young man trying to keep up.

Looking around trying not to attract attention, he catches up.

She pulls away sensing him getting closer.

Still to far to make out what they are saying, it’s still enough to captivate.

He reaches for her hand, barely grasping at the fingertips.

She lashes back at him, spin around ripping her fingers out of his hands.

Startled he falls back on his heels, almost cowering, expecting to be hit.

I’m sad as the tears on her face chocked me up.

Her heartbroken face red, yelling at him without catching her breathe.

An endless supply of oxygen residing in her lungs.

He is more aware of the attention arising around them.

Now his fear and embarrassment are fighting to see who is greater.

Their inaudible conversation, broken by an off-camera comment from a bystander.

“You tell him!,” support for her cause clearly growing.

His embarrassment has beat out his fear.

She goes to strike him but can’t, she starts to crumple and fall down.

Fighting for air and drowning in her tears.

He goes to catch her, she regains her fight.

She walks away.

He has surrendered to losing her and turns around.

She goes forward and he goes back.

What could he have done to her?

The poor soul that just broke in front of the world.

Did he cheat, lie, leave her at the alter, kill her cat and put it in the freezer.

I realize the show has end for as well, a tear rolls down my cheek.

Life is so much more entertaining than cable.

Day#4 SJD

The road is long and empty, with no cars or people in site.

My feet hit the pavement one after another, the asphalt slipper underneath.

The road is wet, the air is foggy and it’s a cloudy.

I pray to the Gods I don’t believe in, that it doesn’t rain.

Alone on this road  with only my thoughts.

Alone like in life, no wife, no kids, no dog and only an annoying family.

They continue to ask me when will I get married, have kids and even “maybe get a dog.”

I have always been alone, by choice not because I’m that much of a loser.

I have friends, but they have their social media.

They only make time to hang out when they need to post more pictures, for their adoring fans.

A gust of wind sends a chill, I put my a hands inside my jacket.

Alone with my thoughts, never a good thing.

Is my life empty? Are my parents right? Is my career a dead end?

The darks thoughts are creeping up, man I will need a drink tonight.

I start thinking how did I get here, how could I have avoided this.

I realize, if I would have only put gas in my car at the last gas station, like my gut told me too.

I would have been driving on this road, instead of being cold, wet and alone with my stupid thoughts.

And no my feet hurt.

Day#3 SJD

 

At one point I look over.

We all look over.

To see how far that fall would be.

See if it will hurt.

Can we make it, or will we die.

Would the fall be worth it.

What is gained from committing to jump.

Mostly all step away.

For them nothing is to be gained.

For most, it’s a childish thought that crossed their mind.

They spit over the edge.

As to laugh in the face of  a youthful self for thinking such things.

That is most of the world, fear.

The only thing they know is fear.

There are those who will jump.

They have thought of it.

They could die.

They could survive in pain.

Or they could fly.

For we will all one day die, that will not change.

Life will hit you the hardest, leaving you to survive in pain.

What is left but to dream.

Dream of the possibilities that awaits you once you step off the edge.

Day#2

 

 

 

I don’t know how many times I have wanted to start.

Something was always missing, or wasn’t perfect.

Not the right background pictures for the banner, hadn’t transcribed my written stories from paper to computer.

Always something, an excuse, a life event, not feeling it today, and after the time pasted, always the regret of why didn’t I start.

Today, I start.

I will write everyday for the next year.

At least once a day, at least one paragraph.

I will make it a habit not to wait for the right time, picture, feeling like it, or for life events to pass.

There will never a better time than right now.

So today I start… now what to write…

 

Day#1 SJD